Why your Matchmaker and Dating Agency Make your Dates Manageable and Fun
When you know you are meeting new love prospects that are personally introduced there is a certain safety factor that allows you to relax, be yourself and even allow yourself some honest vulnerability. Your matchmaker will ensure you get an honest bio of the “date” and also present you in a way to your new “interest” that triggers interest – if you like what both you see, game on!! The secrets to dating successfully are shared by your matchmaker.
Brené Brown defines vulnerability as “uncertainty, risk, and emotional exposure—that unstable feeling we get when we step out of our comfort zone or do something that forces us to loosen control.”
Definition of Dating
Reflecting on this definition I placed it into the context of dating and how it fits so easily into the experience. Based on this definition we inevitably arrive to our first date feeling vulnerable, which is why it’s so darn hard to show up not feeling defensive. ”…uncertainty, risk, and emotional exposure” are the hallmarks of dating, be it the first date or the 9th. It takes time to get to know the person opposite you. Being vulnerable is a reality and not one you can will away.
How then does one arrive with this feeling and without shutting down because of it?
Firstly, I don’t believe one should be trying to arrive on a date feeling anything less than vulnerable. Showing one’s vulnerability makes the exchange real and authentic. If you are seeking a real and authentic relationship, then showing up in this way is a prerequisite.
Matchmaker advice on Vulnerability
Secondly, there isn’t one way to express one’s vulnerability. It doesn’t have to be accompanied by deep wells of salty tears, nor a collapse of all integrity as you fall into a puddle of mush. Expressing one’s vulnerability can be a show of strength, self-expression and courage.
Lastly, if your date can not handle the fact that you are showing up in a way that is authentic, vulnerable, and open, then you should probably evaluate very carefully if you want to continue establishing a relationship with him or her. In my experience, I have found that such people are usually averse or incapable of reciprocating by showing their own vulnerability.
The main reason to show up vulnerable and open is that, in truth, the person you are trying to get to know doesn’t know you yet and the risk of your feelings getting hurt by him or her is limited. As importantly, your courage will be rewarded when the person opposite you shows you the same or shows you an inability to show up in the same way – either way, that is the knowledge that you should be after as you track, like a hunter, the one who is worthy of your love and whom you consider to be worthy of giving your love to.
Please watch this short video by Brene Brown on the power of vulnerability https://youtu.be/AO6n9HmG0qM
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