Today I am writing with a little insight on what is really going down, when something may be coming to an end, or has ended. The little phrase “Darling, I just need space” is worse than the old one, “my cheque is in the post” or “check is in the mail”. Tt is a heart-stopping, gut-dropping moment when we hear that. Even if you know the egg is rotten, being the dumpee is worse than being the dumper (So maybe get in first, LOL) Our dating coaches get asked on occasion, does it really mean goodbye when someone says they need space ?
Best way to say “goodbye for now” is to agree and give the space. Let the dumper go away thinking well of you.
Weeping, drama, begging or making promises or “trying harder” is only going to make you feel worse in the end as doubts will haunt you, if they really mean it or not.
You risk pining, longing and even may end up stalking him/her when being ever-present and in their space, even indirectly. Our expert dating coaches say if you actually do go away, keeping a dignified and friendly stance, and if that person misses you, they will return. They may return just due to curiosity as to why you are not jumping off the nearest cliff in sadness.
Think of hunting as the start of flirtation and looking for new love as part of the courting process, not when the fires have died. That can be worse than road kill. Like the seasons, things must end so they can start fresh. Even the new fruit on the old tree is not the same as last season. Like love, you may need new “fruit” to grow in your orchard. You are not the fruit, you are the tree.
Contact us today if you are looking for coaching or the new love of your life. We can help !!
Shannon and the Team