What do men want?

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Beauty? Brains? A super cook? This is certainly a question that has baffled the female species as well as corporate dating services for ages. Before we elaborate, I believe it is essential to note (for the sake of keeping the peace – especially with Valentine’s Day lurking around the corner) that all men are different. They go through many life stages, and what any particular man is looking for in a woman varies when he is looking to find love. However, there are some basic guidelines as to what attracts a man to a woman.

The first topic up for discussion: Men are visual creatures and look for physical health and attraction when choosing a partner

Yes ladies, most certainly not what we wanted to hear in our search for love – but none the less, the truth. Men choose their mate mostly by the way they look, someone they are physically attracted to and who portrays overall physical health.

This is not to say you have to be a super model, but they are looking for someone who takes pride in their appearance. Men are attracted to women who look and feel great. Such women also exude confidence which men find very sexy. You need to respect and love yourself before you can expect a man to do the same.

Having said that, men are either initially attracted to you or they aren’t and no dating service or dating advice offered can make them become attracted to you. As luck would have it, beauty is in the eye of the beholder and somewhere out there is a man that will appreciate your unique qualities and the effort you put into your appearance.

In short, men want a woman who looks great and is confident about her appearance.

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Comments (5)Add Comment
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written by Amanda Vorster, February 05, 2010
I would like to add that i feel men, especially divorced men or men that have had their hearts shattered are very skeptical when it comes to a woman that is strong and independent. I would also like to know what is the issue with men that have a problem when his lady earns more money than him.... Does it really matter who earns the most ? Surely the person earning the most will contribute a larger amount to the running of their home etc... I have found in my experience older men ( 39 - 47 ) want young poppies and when you eventually meet the man ...... oh my gosh, he should look in the mirror. No I am not being nasty just honest. Surely if you ask for something you should be able to deliver the same. Anyway in this long exciting sometimes tiring journey in the " single life " (divorced) I have yet to find someone who is comfortable with themselves and their proposed partner.... Life is short , sometime the person (package) is judged before given a FAIR chance... ladies this goes for us as well.
regards
Amanda
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written by Ermelinde Mondriaan, February 06, 2010
Yes Amanda I have to agree with you 100%. More so for someone like myself who is 60 and single, guys my age are just interested in ladies half or more their age. I find that there are a few younger men who will give you a chance but most of them are categorising you as a '"Courgar"and I find that very degrading. I firmly believe that age is a number on a piece of paper and that when you meet that some one special then age and other criteria are not important because you meet on a much deeper level and you instantly feel a connection.

Regards
Ermelinde

PS - Are people of my age group allowed to join this service Bonita?? I am asking because as you so aptly said the other sites are dating factories and weird things happen there, but that is a story for another day.
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written by Bonita, February 08, 2010
Yes, the biggest mistake most people make is to expect certain characteristics from their potential partner without having the same to offer that person in return. These type of relationships, although they could last for years, usually don't as they are quite superficial and usually involve another important element such as money. For instance, men date much younger women who are not financially independent but are after their hard earned money. They could never respect these women as much as they could respect an equal (and tend to undermine them often just because they can) another very common flaw in this type of relationship and yet another reason why it does not last. The good news is that there are men out there who prefer an equal. Someone they can love, trust and respect.

Ermelinde, of course you may join this service. MatchVIP caters for people of all ages who are relationship oriented. I have just heard news from the oldest couple I have ever matched (66 and 72) and they are engaged to be married!
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written by Judine, February 13, 2010
Yes, unfortunately a lot of men in their late forties and fifties want young women of 29 or 30 years of age. It is a relationship based on for him EGO and for her DEPENDENCY financially. He will commit quickly here as it boosts him to his buddies, he will pay the price of a huge generation gap which we all know can not work out in the long run. When the attraction eventually settles down, what would be left to keep them together, she will watch him age and as she becomes more confident and enters her prime, starts earning more money....will that "old" man still satisfy her??? We as woman always look at ourselves, and see how stupid we will look dating a man 20 odd years younger than us, but unfortunately men do not see this, they never take a reality check and look in the mirror and realise they are falling into the old cliche of obvious mid life crisis. Unfortunately when I have heard a man dated a woman old enough to be his daughter, I don't really get too excited on seeing him a 2nd time as I realise he is ruled very much by ego alone, has no substance and will never be a keeper, as he will always yearn and want that young woman in the bedroom. Just as an example.....a man of 69 asked me to be his woman the other day...........I really don't want to be a nurse maid, I want a companion. I'm in my mid forties.

I like your ideas on the social events you are hosting, please make it more often, maybe 2x per month, some dressy and some more casual, like a breakfast and a day to a place of interest and fun, also maybe miniture golf for people to form groups and play against each other. Also maybe just a braai and music and social, then of course the smart occassions. That way we can meet new friends and still enjoy the day with no pressure that it is actually a singles gathering.

What you are doing is great so far. ;-))
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written by Judine, February 13, 2010
I am very sceptical of internet dating........I found the short time I actually went on, I had a host of married men looking for "Fun"....I was appalled as I asked for single, divorsed men only and specified I am looking for a partner and a "Decent" man, but ended up with men just looking for a good time, so of course I did not waste my time with them and yes....I am fussy, why must I be a married mans mistress?? this is nothing but heartache and adding a burden to your life....sorry NO....I will stay difficult and fussy until I meet a man who is actually decent and is looking for an equal partner. He does not have to be wealthy, or good looking, just someone I like and click with, for me it is the mind of a man....his character, kindness and the way he treats a woman.....not his looks at all.

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Last Updated ( Monday, 08 March 2010 06:48 )